From Cask to Casket: A Wine-ing Approach to Celebrating the End of a Life

I have to say, it’s not often that my two main interests – wine and end-of-life issues/cemeteries – coincide, so this is an opportunity I could not resist reporting on.

Hodges Funeral Home - Naples

It seems that Hodges Funeral Home dignitymemorial.com/hodges-funeral-home-at-naples-memorial/en-us/index.page

in Naples, Florida believes that grieving is as much about celebrating a life as it is about the end of it. That is why the business had a wine cellar installed in the basement last month.

Let’s face it, few people want to go to the funeral home, and most just want to move through as quickly as possible. But now those attending visitations, wakes, and services at Hodges, in southwest Florida, have the option to meet in the wine cellar to remember the departed in a less traditional setting.

The Wine Cellar

Most people, especially those under 30, would prefer gathering with family and friends in a comfortable atmosphere, maybe with a glass of wine in hand, and share their memories of the departed. It’s a different way to grieve, and that’s what the wine cellar offers.

While it is not traditional, nor does it meet old-school funeral ethics, it does provide a more relaxed and calmer way to mourn and remember. Amid comfortable chairs, high top tables, and racks of wine, this modern wine cellar provides a laid-back, tranquil vibe.

Of course, this is still about honoring the deceased, but this approach sure beats that line of chairs in front of the body, in my opinion. And no other funeral home is known to have a wine cellar, so this is definitely breaking new ground … (There is no mention of what wines are offered, but I’m assuming Bone Dry Red and Two Angels Petite Sirah are not in the line up: but maybe they should be …)

Hodges Funeral Home is not shy about blazing new trails. They also offer catered reception services as part of the Dignity Memorial Community. (Dignity Memorial www.dignitymemorial.com

has over 1,800 funeral homes in the U.S.) A reception can be held at the funeral home, or any place you select. Breakfast can also be ordered for the family the day of the funeral, and delivered at a home or church before services.

One of Hodges Traditional Rooms

For those who believe the traditional way is best, Hodges will continue to offer the standard funeral home experience. But for those looking for a new and innovative way to mourn – the wine cellar seems to provide a modern answer.

Hodges Wine Cellar

If this venue is successful at Hodges Funeral Home, expect to see other Dignity Memorial-owned funeral homes offering the “Cask to Casket” experience. Could this be the trend of the future?  We can only raise a glass, and hope.

~ Joy

Mourning Cards: The Art of Death

When attending a funeral, you may have been given a memorial program with a picture on the front, and inside, a verse and the name of the deceased along with his or her birth and death dates, and related funeral information. This is our modern day equivalent to the mourning card.

Correct Mourning Attire

Mourning Card with Photo

Mourning cards became popular during the early 1800s. Victorian mourning customs were comprised of rituals and strict rules of etiquette. The symbols of mourning were carefully observed, and were used to denote the social standing of the family. But those of poorer means still tried to “keep up with the gentry” when it came to mourning and funeral rituals, regardless of the cost.

Funeral invitations were used during the 17^th and 18^th centuries. The cards were sent to notify family and friends when the funeral was to be held. These invitations were very important socially. A funeral invitation could actually be used like a ticket, to gain admittance to a funeral, especially if it were for someone important or well known.

Funeral Invitation

The funeral invitation was wood engraved, and featured the typical symbols of death found on tombstones: the hourglass, Father Time, the Grim Reaper, or crossed bones. Wealthier families might provide copper-engraved funeral invitations. The invitation also contained details about the departed, along with the time, date, and location of the funeral.

Attending a Funeral

By the Victorian era (1830 - 1901), the funeral invitation was no longer popular. Instead, small mourning or memorial cards were sent out after the funeral, usually to those who could not attend. Information about the funeral might also be included.

Most mourning cards were 3 by 4.5 inches, constructed from heavy card-stock, and made up of intricate, formal designs that were cut and embossed. Symbolism was very popular during the Victorian Era, and again, those gravestone symbols could be found decorating mourning cards.

Two Babies After Death

A heavy black border usually framed the card, which included the birth and death dates. Other pertinent information about the deceased might be listed, along with a prayer, poem, or sentimental words of remembrance. If the deceased were a child or young adult, many times a photo, usually taken after death, would be used.

Those with wealth might opt for a larger mourning card, measuring about 4 by 6 inches, and lettered in gold, or embossed with intricate artwork.

But regardless of size, it was expected that the mourning card would be saved and placed in an album, or hung in a frame as a keepsake. Mourning cards belonging to family members might also contain a lock of the deceased’s hair, or a button from a uniform. These items would be included in the framed presentation.

By the beginning of the 20^th century, the memorial card had been folded, with a scene on the front, and the deceased's name and information printed inside.  As this type of card became popular, all four sides contained information about the deceased, and included poems, photos, and artwork.

Today, memorial cards come in a vast variety of choices: religious, landscapes, hobbies, sports … Poems and remembrances can be selected from thousands that are available, or a personal remembrance can be written. Cards may be given out at the visitation, vigil, or wake, or be presented at the funeral or memorial service.

Today's memorial items also include bookmarks, key rings, memorial car magnets, and memory books. Funeral homes may offer these remembrances, but the family can elect to have them printed at a local printing shop, order over the internet, or create them at home on the computer.

Call them mourning cards or memorial cards; these keepsake remembrances are part of a funeral custom we continue to practice - a traditional way in which we offer a lasting tribute to those we love.

~ Joy

Cemetery Statues of Hope

Just as there are statues of grief in the cemetery, there are also statues of faith, courage and hope. The dictionary defines hope as something you “expect or look forward to with confidence and trust.”

Hope is the desire for a positive outcome from a circumstance or situation, including death. Hope can be expressed in many ways in the cemetery including:

Anchor on Stone

A rose left on a grave.

An anchor symbolizing hope for seafarers and Christians.

Dove in Flight

A dove is a symbol of hope, just as all birds in flight.

And here are more symbols of hope found in the cemetery.

Angels:

Just as angels can be symbols of mourning, they can also be the bearers of hope, celebrating the passing of a soul and assisting it on to heaven.

Angels Dancing:

Angels Assisting a Soul:

Children:

Children can also signify hope in the cemetery. Here one child dances at the release death has provided – as two children gaze at a butterfly, a symbol of purity and the transformation of the soul.

Birds in Flight:

A bird taking off or in flight symbolized the release of the soul and it’s flight to the afterlife and rebirth.

Open Gates:

Gates are usually open to signify the soul entering heaven, or as a portal to the afterlife.

Women:

Just as women are the mourners for humankind, they are also the ones who rejoice and express jubilation for the passing of a soul, especially if death is seen as a release, and a celebration. Women may be found dancing, running, looking foreward, or standing at the cross – all are poised in a moment of remembrance, and freedom.  
 
 

 

Signs of hope abound in the cemetery, if you only take the time to look...

~ Joy