Remembering Fathers in the Cemetery

Sonora Smart Dodd

This Sunday is Father’s Day, a day which is celebrated on the third Sunday of June each year in the United States.  Sonora Smart Dodd thought of the idea of having a special day to honor fathers in 1909.

William Johnson Smart

Sonora’s father, William Smart, was a widower whose wife died while giving birth to their sixth child.  He raised all six children by himself.  Sonora felt that all fathers should be honored for their selfless actions with a special day.  She chose June because that was the month of her father’s birth.  The first official Father’s Day celebration was held on June 19^th, 1910 in Spokane, Washington.

A bill to gain national attention for the holiday was introduced in Congress in 1913.  In 1924, President Calvin Coolidge publicly backed the idea, but stopped short of issuing a national proclamation.  It was 1966 when President Lyndon Johnson signed a presidential proclamation honoring fathers by declaring the 3^rd Sunday of June as Father’s Day.    President Richard Nixon made it a permanent national holiday by signing it into law in 1972.

 

A day to celebrate fathers is held in over 50 countries around the world, usually in May, June or the early autumn.  Some Catholic countries celebrate it on the Feast of St. Joseph.  The flower symbolic of Father’s Day, is the rose.  Red is to be worn for a living father and white for a father who has passed on.

Statistics show that Father’s Day is the fifth most popular holiday for the sending of cards.  It is estimated that $95 million is spent on cards each year.  This includes cards not just for fathers, but grandfathers, uncles, sons and son-in-laws.  And although more direct phone calls are made on Mother’s Day, more collect calls occur on Father’s Day.

There are many quotes about fathers including:

"It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was." -- Anne Sexton

"I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection." -- Sigmund Freud

"If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in

any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right."

-- Bill Cosby

 In cemeteries too, fathers are remembered and honored in many ways and by various names.  A father who acted as teacher, disciplinarian, protector and friend is one to be honored and remembered.

Miss me, but let me go

When I come to the end of the road

And the sun has set for me

I want no rites in a gloom filled room

Why cry for a soul set free

Miss me a little - but not too long

And not with your head bowed low

Remember the love that we once shared

Miss me - but let me go

For this is a journey that we must all take

And each must go alone

It's all a part of the Master's plan

A step on the road home

When you are lonely, and sick of heart

Go to the friends we know

And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds

Miss me - but let me go

~ Anonymous

Death is nothing at all

I have only slipped away into the next room

I am I, and you are you.

Whatever we were to each other

That we still are.

Call me by my old familiar name

Speak to me in the easy way which you always used

Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes

We enjoyed together.

Play, smile, think of me, pray for me,

Let my name be ever the household word that

It always was.

Let it be spoken without effort,

Without the trace of a shadow on it.

Life means all that it ever meant

It is the same as it ever was

There is absolutely unbroken continuity.

Why should I be out of mind because I am

Out of sight? I am but waiting for you

For an interval

Somewhere very near

Just around the corner .

All is well.

~ Canon Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)

Happy Father’s Day!

~ Joy

Modern Woodmen of America

Tree Stone Grave Marker

If you've spent much time wandering cemeteries, you’ve come across those realistic, but sometimes ornate, tree stone grave markers.  While intriguing, there are always questions concerning them: How did they come about?  What do they represent?  And is there a difference between the organizations MWA and WOW?  Read on…….

Joseph Cullen Root

Joseph Cullen Root founded Modern Woodmen of America http://www.modern-woodmen.org/ in Lyons, Iowa in 1883.  Root was a member of several fraternal organizations and wanted to create one that would provide insurance benefits to a family when the husband/father died.   Most fraternal organizations at the time were tied to religious orders.  But Root imagined one without religious ties, a society that would “bind in one association, the Jew and the Gentile, the Catholic and the Protestant, the Agnostic and the Atheist.”

Root decided on the woodmen name after hearing a minister describe his congregation as ‘trees in God’s forest.” When first founded, modern woodmen were white men between the ages of 18 and 45, from rural Midwestern states.  The home office of MWA began in Fulton, Illinois in 1884 and moved to Rock Island, Illinois in 1897, where it remains today.

Royal Neighbors
of America

In 1888, the ladies auxiliary of the MWA, the Royal Neighbors of America (RNA), was started.  Their symbol was a five-petal flower.

Woodmen of the World Logo

In 1890, after a heated dispute, Root left the Modern Woodmen of America to found another fraternal insurance benefit society, Woodmen of the World (WOW or WOTW) in Omaha, Nebraska.

Foresters Drill Teams

The Modern Woodmen of America (MWA) became well known for their drill teams.  Known as the Foresters, over 10,000 units, made up of over 160,000 men performed nationally from 1893 through the late 1930’s.   The Foresters Drill Teams performed at parades and festivals across the country, and even entertained at the White House for President Hoover.

MWA TB Sanatorium

MWA members were also known for their community assistance.  The organization built a 1,000-acre, $1.5 million dollar tuberculosis sanatorium in Colorado Springs, Colorado in 1909, one of the largest in the country.  It was named as one of the most outstanding TB institutions by the American College of Surgeons. Over 12, 000 MWA members were treated there for free.   The recovery rate at the institute was an amazing 70%.  The facility closed in 1947 when drug treatments for tuberculosis showed promise and deaths began to decline. In 1910 MWA membership hit the one million mark.  By 1929 women and children were also being insured by the group.

MWA Marker

Founder Joseph Root wrote a funeral ceremony that was to be performed when a member died.  These ceremonies were held during the late 19^th and early 20^th centuries.  Today, memorial services are held during the month of June at each chapter to remember their deceased members.  

MWA Marker

Ornate and interwoven
MWA

MWA offered it's members the opportunity to purchase grave markers for deceased associates until the mid-1970’s.  Cemeteries around the country also have tree stone monuments, engraved with the MWA initials and symbols.  MWA did not supply these grave markers or provide any monetary assistance for their purchase for members.  Woodmen of the World did provide assistance for tree stone grave monuments for their members. 

Prices for MWA Logo

Montgomery Wards
Tree Stone Marker

Tree stone markers were also available for purchase from the Sears and Roebuck catalogue and the Montgomery Ward catalogue during the early twentieth century.  A tree stone marker does not necessarily mean that person was a member of MWA or WOW.  Only if the organizations' initials or symbols are located on the stone does it indicate that the deceased was a member of one of these organizations.

The MWA doctrine includes striving for family financial security, positive family life and service to the community.  MWA symbols include the axe to represent industry, the wedge to signify power and the beetle to illustrate progress.  The logo is made up of the capital letters M W A.  Their motto remains “Pour Autre Vie.” – ‘For the life of another.’

Today, the Modern Woodmen of American is the nation’s third largest fraternal benefit society, with close to 750-million members.  The group has assets of over $9 billion.  Close to 2,200 chapters or ‘camps’, exist in the U.S., mainly in the Midwest and the South.  MWA meetings are held throughout the year, along with parades, and community events.  The MWA also supports youth activities and organizations throughout the country.  In 2008, Modern Woodmen of America celebrated their 125th Anniversary.

Friday, we’ll explore Father’s Day in the cemetery.  

Next Tuesday we’ll take a look at the second fraternal benefit society that Joseph Root founded, Woodmen of the World. This is the organization known for the tree stone grave markers.

~ Joy

Going to the Chapel…Cemetery Weddings

It’s June, the season of weddings.  So I decided to see what people thought of the idea of  ‘tying the knot’ in a cemetery.  It turns out this may be a trend of the future!

According to The Mortician Journal http://www.morticianjournal.com/, out of a list of ‘25 Funeral Trends for 2011’, #8 is “More and more funeral facilities will be used for other services (like weddings and birthdays.)  Funeral homes and cemeteries are now starting to utilize their chapels and grounds for ‘celebration events.’

Community Life Center

In Indianapolis, Indiana, Flanner and Buchanan Funeral Centers http://www.flannerbuchanan.com/ built a ten-million dollar structure they call the ‘Community Life Center’ http://www.clcindy.com/  Opened in 2009, the Center was the site of ten weddings that year.  It now holds several events each month and has over 100 weddings booked for this year and into 2012.

Research indicates that more and more couples, within the past five-year, have entertained the idea of, if not actually been married in cemetery and funeral home chapels.  This interest has caught the attention of cemetery superintendents, sextons and funeral home directors, who are now viewing their sites as places to celebrate life as well as mourn the dead.

Wedding Carriage

Events being held in cemeteries have included birthday celebrations, anniversary parties, seasonal musical events, historic grounds tours, proms, holiday gatherings, banquets, family reunions, business conferences and weddings.  According to a survey conducted by the National Funeral Directors Association, http://www.nfda.org/, almost 10% of over 600 funeral homes in the U.S. have or are offering an event center for use by the community.  Some funeral homes also offer their expertise in planning a wedding.  And that does make sense.  What a funeral home director can accomplish in three days for a funeral, they can also achieve for a wedding, in record time.  In this new market, wedding planners are just beginning to take consider this a viable wedding option.

Norman Chapel

Inside of chapel

The appeal of a cemetery as a wedding location is easy to understand.   According to Leigh Hensley, Executive Assistant at Spring Grove Cemetery and Arboretun http://www.springgrove.org/ in Cincinnati, Ohio, there are many reasons for couples to choose to be married in a cemetery.  For Spring Grove, it may be because of the historic nature and beauty of the grounds, or the gorgeous Norman Chapel, which is non-denominational.  And many times the location has to do with family members being interred there and the sentimental act of including those who have gone ahead.  Hensley said that Spring Grove hosts around 45 wedding per year in the Norman Chapel or their rose garden. http://www.springgrove.org/sg/weddings/sg_weddings.shtm

Cemeteries weddings are also considered to be more ‘green,’ or environmentally friendly, than most regular wedding and reception sites.    And, as an added bonus, the price is usually much less than traditional wedding venues. 

But we are not the first to be drawn to cemeteries to celebrate our life events.  In the mid-1800’s, people treated the cemetery as if it were a park, picnicking, enjoying boat rides on the lake, or taking a quiet carriage ride through the grounds.

During WW II, the Forest Lawn Cemeteries http://www.forestlawn.com/ in California buried during the day and married during the night.  Today the cemetery group has eight chapels that are used for funerals and weddings.

And the interest in cemetery weddings is not just occurring in the U.S.  Cemetery weddings have been reported this year in many parts of the world including Indonesia and China.  The main reasons given overseas for having a cemetery wedding are the same - the beauty of the location, the meaningfulness of being married near ancestors, and the lower cost.

I asked readers of A Grave Interest, friends on my personal page, and members of A Graveyard Rabbit and Cemetery Explorers, all on Facebook, if any of them had been married in a cemetery and how they felt about cemetery weddings.  The overwhelming response was very positive.  While it was a novel idea to some, almost all felt it would be a very peaceful and beautiful location for a wedding.  Here are some of the replies:

Katie Killian wrote: "I would do it in a heartbeat if there was one that I found pretty enough or interesting enough to do it in. There aren't any in Indy that I have any ties to, though."

Steve Kalland thought it was a “Great idea.”

Save A Grave stated:  “I think it’s a cool place to have a wedding.  You can find some great places that would be beautiful for a wedding.  I don’t know anyone who has done it.”

Stewart Dashwood replied: “Sounds interesting!  I like the idea but my fiancé (despite loving cemeteries) isn’t quite sold on it.”

Tricia Neal responded: “Had some pictures taken after the wedding with the old church cemetery in the background, but didn’t actually get married IN the cemetery!  (And the fact that the cemetery was in the background in the pictures was unintentional, although if I’d thought about it at the time, I would have made sure it happened that way!)

Cheryl Mason wrote: “A cemetery in Savannah…under oaks draped in Spanish moss….”

Only a few people were somewhat wary of the idea –

Allison Butt commented that she didn’t “know of anyone doing it.  I don’t think I like the idea, although the setting would be peaceful!”

Beverly Ross Nance replied: “Hmmm, no.  But my family used to picnic in them...”

Thanks to everyone who replied!  So what do you think?  Would you get married, or renew your vows in a cemetery?  I definitely would!  But then, how would you decide, between all of the beautiful cemeteries and chapel out there, which one?  Something to ponder during the next wedding you attend.

~ Joy

Celebrating 'Daniel Boone Day'

Daniel Boone

Today is “Daniel Boone Day”.  It was on this date in 1769 that frontiersman and American folk hero, Daniel Boone first saw the great land of what would one day become known as Kentucky.

Daniel Boone was born on October 22, 1734 but because the Gregorian calendar was adopted during his lifetime, his birth date was changed to November 2, 1734.  Boone only accepted the October 22 date.  He was born the sixth of eleven children in Berks County, Pennsylvania to Squire and Sarah Morgan Boone.  His parents were of English and Welsh decent and were practicing Quakers. 

Boone spent his childhood hunting and trapping in Pennsylvania, before his parents moved to Davie County, North Carolina in 1750. Although his formal education was limited, Boone was often the only literate person in a group of frontiersmen. 

Boone and his dog

He served with the British militia during the French and Indian War.  Then, on August 14, 1756, he married Rebecca Bryan.  The couple settled in a cabin on Boone’s father’s farm in the Yadkin Valley in North Carolina.  Boone supported his family as a market hunter.  During the autumns, he would go on “long hunts", which lasted several weeks or months.  During that time he would collect hundreds of deer, beaver and otter skins to sell to the commercial fur traders on his return in the spring.  Once asked if he ever became lost during these long hunts, Boone supposedly replied, “I’ve never been lost, but I was once bewildered for three days.”  By the late 1760’s, Boone was traveling up and down the Ohio River trapping for furs in the Cumberland and Green Valleys.

Daniel Boone is well known for founding the first settlement west of the Appalachian mountain in what is now the Commonwealth of Kentucky.  This region was beyond the western boundaries of the original thirteen colonies and legally belonged to the Commonwealth of Virginia, and the Indians.  

On September 25, 1773, Boone moved with his family and about 50 other pioneers, to begin the first settlement in Kentucky, ignoring the British ban on westward migration. During their attempt to establish a settlement, Boone’s older son James and another man, William Russell, were captured, tortured and killed by Indians.  The killings were so brutal; Boone’s party decided to abandon the idea of a settlement and turned back.  This massacre was one of the first events in what would become known as Dunmore’s War.

Crossing the Cumberland Gap

In the spring of 1775, Boone blazed a trail through the Cumberland Gap, opening up what became known as the Wilderness Road from North Carolina and Tennessee into Kentucky.  Once in central Kentucky, Boone built a fort in what is now Madison County and founded the community of Boonesborough, Kentucky.  On September 8, 1775, he brought his family and other settlers to Boonesborough to live in one of the first English-speaking settlements west of the Appalachians. Boone told the pioneers there were three elements vital to survival here, “A good gun, a good horse and a good wife.”  Thousands of pioneer families poured through the steep and rough pass on foot or horseback, heading for the ‘promised land.’   In 1792, the newly formed Kentucky legislature provided money to upgrade the Wilderness Road.  In 1796, the road was improved enough for wagon travel.  By 1800, over 200,000 pioneers had traversed Boone’s road and crossed the Cumberland Gap to settle in Kentucky.  Forty years later, in 1840, the Wilderness Road was abandoned.

Capture of Jemima

Up until this time, Boone’s life had been an adventure, but he began to suffer hardships in the summer of 1776.  In July, his daughter Jemima was captured by the Shawnee and Cherokee Indians.  He rescued her but only two years later the Shawnee seized him.  

Capture of Boone

He managed to escape and warn Boonesborough of an impending attack, thus saving them from capture.  After the uprising, he set off East to purchases lands for some of the settlers.  Along the way, he was robbed of all the money he had been given.  He repaid the settlers out of his own money and was never able to get out of debt again.

In 1781, Boone was elected to the Virginia legislature.  In 1786, he was elected again.  Two years later, he left Kentucky after he lost all of his land claims due to an error in the records. He moved west to what is now Missouri.  When asked why he had left Kentucky Boone reportedly replied, “Too crowded, too crowded!  I want some elbow room.”

Boone Half Dollar

Boone was an explorer, a frontiersman and a legend in his own time.  His deeds and accomplishments were woven into an assortment of fact, legend and folklore, weaving him into the fabric of American history as a folk hero.  Boone’s autobiography, called “Adventures” was published in 1784, making him famous throughout America and Europe.

Boone's Grave Site
at Frankfort, KY

View from Boone's Kentucky
Grave Site

Daniel Boone died on September 26, 1820 at his son’s home on Femme Osage Creek in Missouri.  He was buried on Teuque Creek, next to his wife, Rebecca, who had died in 1813.   In 1845, Boone’s remains were taken and reburied in the new cemetery (Frankfort Cemetery) in Frankfort, Kentucky.  Legend has it that the wrong bones were dug up in Missouri and taken back to Kentucky.  Both cemeteries still claim to have Boone buried there.

Engraving on Grave Marker

Regardless, Daniel Boone will always be remembered as one of the earliest frontiersmen in America, a hunter, explorer and pioneer, a true and fearless leader of the great westward migration of our country.

~ Joy

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

Cemeteries Worth the Visit - Glenwood Cemetery

At the beginning of month we’ll take a look at one cemetery that is especially “Worth the Visit.”  This means that it offers something exceptional for the historian, genealogist and tombstone tourist.  It could be outstanding gravestones, interesting cemetery grounds, or just an exciting place to explore!  Today we will begin this monthly series at Glenwood Cemetery, located in Shelbyville, Illinois.  The stones, the hills and valleys, and the walking bridges are superb.

Underground Mausoleum

H.J. Hamlin Mausoleum

Glenwood has some wonderful examples of statues, stones and cemetery architecture.  There are five mausoleums in Glenwood.  The five family names are Earp, Hamlin, Harnett, Haydon, and Tackett.  Other well-known family names from the area include Davis, Miller, Oliver, Smith, Weakly and Williams.

Shells surround Thornton's monument

Anthony Thornton plaque

The famous buried here include Illinois politicians Samuel Moulton and Anthony Thornton.  Josephine Garis Cochran, the inventor or the dishwasher, is also buried here.  General William Thornton who fought in the War of 1812 is buried in a family plot.  And John G. O’Brien, a man who lived in three centuries - the eighteenth, nineteenth and twentieth - 1793 to 1901 is at rest here.  Mr. O’Brien died at the age of 108.

There are numerous stones throughout the cemetery, which catch your eye and imagination.  Here are two that I found intriguing.  This is an open book on a tree stump with ivy vining up it.  In Victorian symbolism the book may stand for someone who was intelligent and well read.  The tree stump symbolizes a life interrupted and the ivy signifies faithful ness and undying friendship.  Tyson Mahnke, the cemetery sexton, told me that this is Phillip Nicoale's gravestone.  He was part owner in a cigar factory in the 1860’s. 

George F. Furr

Be aware that when wandering the cemetery, you may be caught off-guard by the gaze of a WWI soldier, standing at ease on a hilltop.  Carved in Italy from white cara marble, this sculpture is the exact likeness of the young soldier named George F. Furr who lies buried beneath.  On his stone is the notation: Co. 1 53rd U.S. INF 4th Div.

Map of cemetery

For the genealogist, Glenwood offers several options.  The Sexton’s office has burial records on paper and computer.  Maps are available for each section, and for the entire cemetery.  And, for those unable to make the trip, Sexton Tyson Mahnke has been known to go the extra mile to assist researchers, when possible.

Stone Walking Bridge

If you travel to Shelbyville, plan on spending at least one day at Glenwood Cemetery.  This is a cemetery where exploring stones and enjoying nature go hand-in-hand.  While you’re visiting Shelbyville, be sure to stop by the Shelby County Historical Society and the Shelby County Courthouse for more genealogical information.

If you would like more information about Glenwood Cemetery, contact Tyson Mahnke, Cemetery Sexton at (217) 774-3514 or by email at gravdigr@live.com  The cemetery is located at 308 E North 6^th Street in Shelbyville, Illinois.  The office is open Monday through Friday from 7:00 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.  Glenwood also has a Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Glenwood-Cemetery/118663618164180

What a nice way to keep in touch with the cemetery and other genealogists.

~  Joy